AAAHHH!!!

SOMEONE STOLE DWIGHT!
Took him (well, the bobblehead effigy of him) right off my desk. I didn't notice at first but found a big typed note taped to the shelf Schrute usually occupies. The note says that he is safe but if I ever want to see him again I'll bring a large bag of M&Ms to work next Wed and the switch will be made during the day. If I don't follow the instructions they will hand him over to Jim.

I guess I gotta do what they say. I could try to figure out who it is and extract him from enemy territory but that could be dangerous. It looks like they've won. I'm not worried about him though, he's a survivor. He'll pull through. I just hope he took his physician's desk reference book hollowed out with waterproof matches, iodine tablets, beet seeds, protein bars, a NASA blanket, and Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, in case he gets bored.